Football duties were never the same..

Ex BTP officer.

Back in the early 90's deployed on football duties at Norwood Junction Railway station with three other officers, one of whom always fancied himself as a bit of a ladies man. George (not his real name) would try to flirt with virtually any woman. We were joined by two female officers on horseback who positioned themselves either side of the entrance to the station.

Summoning up the courage and no doubt considering possible opening lines. George announces that he's going for it and sidles up to one of the female officers. Standing to one side and glancing at the horse before looking up, says "You're horse is looking tired"

Quick as a flash and with no hesitation she says "If you were between my legs for eight hours, you'd be tired too"

Exit, one red faced officer with his tail between his legs...