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Officers 'sign up' to 20-week course Tributes made to Police Federation 'stalwart' following sudden death Police Memorial Day Fallen officers remembered during annual memorial Empty stomachs, killer huskies and #Gobbledygook

► Sir Peter Fahy will enjoy “the traditional Greater Manchester Police (GMP) dish of chips and gravy – none of this posh nosh” for his last supper as chief before he rides off into the sunset to head up international children’s charity Retrak later this month. But where will the greasy grub come from? The desolate zone around GMP’s glossy new HQ in Newton Heath is a nutritional desert. Despite being a hub for thousands of police officers as well as salarymen working in nearby offices for firms including Fujitsu, there is not so much as a barista in sight. The only source of nourishment is the headquarters’ café, described as “crap” by a source, who added: “There’s nothing around here. There's butterfly bushes and that's about it." This time last year PoliceOracle.com reported that GMP officers were “too busy to eat”, but maybe it’s just that they can’t find anywhere to fill their bellies. Someone should occupy this gap in the market – fast.

► Speaking of refreshment, police family favourite, author and all round twitterholic Mike Pannett has exclusively revealed that he has 10,000 of boxes of Yorkshire Gold tea stored in his house. “I’m sponsored by them,” explained the Yorkshireman, who hands out tea boxes in place of business cards. “It’s me and Wallace and Gromit.” During the London Riots, Mike sent scores of boxes of tea to New Scotland Yard to help with morale. His books include “Now Then, Lad” and “Just the Job, Lad”. You get the picture. He served for two decades in the police, latterly as a countryside and wildlife crime officer.

► While we’re on the subject, Sergeant Rob Taylor of North Wales Police, who is an expert in rural policing, took to Twitter last month to post a picture of a canine sledge puller. “Recently this breed of dog has been responsible for a higher number of sheep attacks than other breeds,” he wrote. “Husky. Why?” He added: “Thinking outside the box here. Links to full moons? Anyone got any thoughts on this? Must be something I'm missing.” The local paper duly obliged. “Game of Thrones could be linked to increase in husky attacks in North Wales,” ran a headline in the Daily Post. The article added that an unprecedented rise in unwanted huskies could also be linked to the success of American film franchise Twilight.

► Congratulations! The prize for the most incomprehensible speech by a police chief goes to Cheshire Constabulary’s Simon Byrne. Promoting a Twitter hashtag, #LeadersMakeChoices, as an alternative to the Fed’s #CutsHaveConsequences, he spoke about his “focus on prevention, coupled with a personal wrap around when that effort fails”. Personal wrap around? Does this mean a big hug? Incidentally, the Cheshire force recently celebrated its work helping "customers". Blegh! How about another hashtag, #Gobbledygook?

► The prize for the worst spelling by a police organisation, meanwhile, goes to the National Police Chiefs’ Council (NPCC), which recently sent out a press release talking about “powerful encrytion” of digital communications. “NPCC Lead on Communications Data, Assistant Chief Constable Richard Berry, responds to Apple’s recent anouncement (sic) that they are committed to using powerful encrytion (sic) on their devices.” The NPCC replaced ACPO earlier this year at a cost of goodness knows what. At the time, no one in the press office could explain what had changed. As one senior cop remarked at the time: “Marathon has become Snickers.”